the climb

One of these days I will catch up... But not today.

2011-11-29T22:55:00.000-08:00

I am so behind. In everything. I should probably just change the name of my blog to: My life {in pictures} because that seems to be all I have time for lately! I am "hoping" that once I get this semester finished, I will have a little more free time? we will see. but for now, this will have to do.

Oscar and Lola on their first trick-or-treating experience...

Oscar was SO excited, he didn't care what he was wearing!

All the kids ready to go!

Lola knew there had to be something good behind that wrapper!

Milo as Micheal Jackson...

Crazy hair day at school.

The kids sporting their Argentine jerseys that Grandma brought back from her trip.

Oh how I miss eating outside! just sweep it of the deck for the birds. Now, all that is o my kitchen floor!

Milo and Cousin Zane at their last soccer game of the season.

Lola cheering for Milo at his early morning soccer game. Boots and Jammies!

GO MILO!!!

Oscar was REALLY into the game! he cant wait till he is old enough to play

Me and Babies...

Its kind of hard to see... but my sister dressed up as ME! for Halloween, she tied two babies to her legs...yep! sounds about right! Oscar and Lola dressed as Peter Pan and Tink, and I pulled out the good ol' Pocahontas costume for another year.

When all else fails, just put on a huge wig and call it good! ;)

Too cute!

Augie, as ASTRO BOY! I was surprised by how many people didn't know who Astro boy was? we homemade this nifty little costume... not to shabby?

LOVE.

Maybe next time I will actually post something worth reading... maybe.

week re-cap {in pictures}

2011-09-11T21:55:00.000-07:00

We offically have WALKERS! both the babies have been doing little steps here and there for months now, but they would never just walk freely. Well, just this week, while we were playing with the kids outside, Lola started to stand up all on her own and start walking! it was crazy because she had never done anyhting like that before! and the best part was that we have it on video! it is so cute.

Exactly on day after Lola decided to start walking, Oscar started doing the same. I really feel like they are so much happier now that they can walk! I probably will be regretting it soon, but for now it is a welcomed change.

Augy started pre-school this week, and he absolutely loves it! It is so great for him to get out and be with kids his age, and have a little structure. Plus, I love the one-on-one time I have with the babies while he is gone. While he is not at school, he is constanly riding his power wheels, he is obsessed!

(this is a really poor picture) This is Milo and his map of Utah made with rice crispy treats. He was so excited about this.

Russ took the boys dove hunting, and "we" (meaning Russ and Milo) enjoyed some homemade dove nuggets. mmmm?

This is a creepy spider the boys found, we kept it for a day, then let it go...far away from our house.

Beautiful September sunset view from a park by our house...

Lola doing her baby Yoga :)

And last but not least... Russ and I celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary last Monday! (we look like babies in this picture... )

First Day of School, Fun and Funerals

2011-08-26T23:08:00.000-07:00

This has been a very busy week here! It started off with the Funeral of Russ' sweet Grandmother Betty Lola (Lola's namesake) It was a bittersweet occasion because Russ' Grandfather passed away exactly 4 weeks before his wife! It was sad to have them both pass, but it is comforting to know they are together, happy. I was able to do the casket pieces for the both of them, which is always enjoyable to me. it was a beautiful service. Milo was so emotional for Grandpas funeral, it was his first experience with losing a loved one and he is already a really emotional boy. He was a little better at Grandmas funeral, because he felt the peace and happiness in knowing that they were together. They will truly be missed.

Another big event this week... Milo Started School! 4th grade! Hallelujah! He was a little nervous the first few days, but he has been more excited lately. He is so hard on himself, it makes me so sad to see him struggle with his spelling and reading so much. I am anxious to talk to his teacher this year and see if she has any recommendations for ways that I can help him. there has got to be something! right?

Auggie will be starting Pre-school after Labor day, he is so excited and so ready to learn! it will be so Nice for me to only have 2 kids at home for 2 1/2 hours three days a week!

The Babies are just growing up, and I feel a little bad saying this, but I love it! I wish they were like 3 already. (three is the cutest age in my opinion) Oscar now has 6 teeth! and silly little Lola only has 2! they are developing such fun personalities. everyday is an adventure.

Milo eating his First Day of School, After School Snack... I may have had one too :)

Auggie and his cookie that i had to force him to eat, he thought it looked gross, until I literally had to force him to try a bite and he LOVED it! of course!

Mmmmmmmmmmm!

These were adorable little blankets and pillows that Nana gave to the Babies for their birthdays, They Love to snuggle them, and roll all over them!

"we climbed on the dishwasher, HIGH FIVE!"

Lola texting her Friends "my brother is so lame LOL"

Casket Piece for Grandma Ellsworth

Boutonnieres for pallbearers

Bear Lake, Birthdays and way to many pictures!

2011-08-17T22:58:00.000-07:00

Why do I feel this tremendous guilt when I don't update!? I think it is because I love looking back over the years and reminiscing, and so when I am not keeping this up to date, I know I will regret it later! Anywho... here we are. The summer is over, school for Milo starts on Tuesday (4th grade!), preschool for Auggie starts next month, and my school starts in a week and a half! I feel like the semester just ended, O-wait! that's because it did. I am happy to report that I got straight A's my first semester back since having the twins! whoo hoo! lets hope I can keep it up next semester.

Well, The babies officially turned one on July 3oth. I still cant wrap my head around the fact that they have been here for a full year! I feel like it has all been a haze, is that weird? I kind of feel like I wasn't here? I don't know, it has just flown by!

They are getting so big! here are a few fun facts about them:

Oscar

Can totally walk but chooses not to. he will walk on his knees everywhere!
makes the cutest kissy face.
loves to say "ahh choo"
is obsessed with pacifiers, especially Lola's pink ones!
Will eat just about everything, EVERYTHING! (even bird poop, yes, that's what I said.)
is a total mommas boy.
Loves to rough house with his 3 year old brother.
Loves to slap and scratch Lola. (naughty)
is an excellent napper!
Loves to dance by shaking his head (so adorable!)
has the cutest giggle I have ever heard in my life!

Lola

Wants to walk really bad! (but usually ends up falling flat on her face :()
Loves to sing (her fav: L-O-L-A Lola, L-O-L-A Lola.... You know.. right?)
scrunches her nose when shes happy
Picky Picky eater.
Loves to clap her hands
can make herself throw up if she wants! what? anyone else deal with this?
dances at the sound of any music
Loves to wear hats and things on her head
says uh-oh
climbs on everything! fearless!

Now get ready for a million pictures. OK, not a million, that would take to long to load, but here are some of our recent adventures.

Lola Loves to be thrown up on the air, I think we have a million pictures like this, but I thought this was cute, cause she was in her fairy costume...

weeee!

Lola clapping for joy as she eats her birthday treats.

So excited! that's how I am to when I eat chocolate...

and they're off!

Oscar showing his newest trick. If you ask him, "how old are you?" he will hold up his little finger.

mmmm, ice cream cone minus the ice cream.

chocolate.... 'nuff said.

Beautiful Blue Eyes!

She didn't want to take off this costume that she wore all day! such a girl.

Oscar decided Lola's looked better than his. He usually does this every time we eat.

Super cool big double swing!

Bear Lake, This is where we could find Milo most of the time!

Beach Baby!

Auggie and his best buddy Logan.. Par-tay!

This is one of my favorites! Look at the expression on the babies faces! hilarious. This was our "911" birthday party, Milo turned 9 and the babies both turned 1.. get it? ha. ha. ha.

Happy 1st Year Oscar and Lola!

2011-07-30T23:38:00.000-07:00

Today is Oscar and Lola's First Birthday! We just got home from Bear Lake a few hours ago, so I only have time to post a quick picture and say HAPPY BIRTHDAY babies! I cant believe it!

More to come soon!

Some Summer...

2011-07-17T22:06:00.000-07:00

I just cant seem to catch up! This summer is just moving along so fast! I have been so busy with School and Work that I haven't had a second to blog or post any of the million pictures I have taken this summer. And to top it all off, Milo is turning 9, and the babies are turning 1, in less than 2 weeks!!! I can hardly believe it. it really has gone by so fast. so fast. We are going to be at Bear Lake for their birthdays, but I am sure we will be doing a big family party when we get home, but that is just one more thing i need to do! My house is no where near the point of cleanliness I want it to be. I am struggling with Auggie and his 3 year old craziness. I have not exercised in over 3 years. BUT, I'm alive. My kids are alive and healthy (except for the little bout of pink eye we have right now.) and I guess that is good enough for now?

Oscar is now walking small distances, and Lola is trying so hard! I think she just loves when she gets attention... oh boy! we're in trouble with her!

I really have SO many pictures and for some reason my computer is not letting me get them all right now, so i will just post what I can for now and hopefully get more on later...

Sweet Lolitta, everywhere we go people comment on her big brown eyes! she loves to give everyone big smiles!

The Boys did some fun Tie Dye shirts, it was a huge mess! but turned out so cool! I will have to post some finished product pictures when my computer is cooperating.

Pretty roses from our yard. They smell sooo Good!

Oscar ENJOYING his otter pop. I think it feels really good on his growing teeth!

This was my yard sale fancy find, i use it as my Pretty Paci holder. Cute. right?

sunny days...

2011-06-12T22:58:00.000-07:00

Lola, exploring the grass. Not only does she love to crawl on the grass, but she doesn't mind eating it either.
(better grass, than the bird poop I found Oscar eating the other day.)

We always refer to the babies as "puppies" they seriously follow us around everywhere! and the just crawl all over and climb up you, and push each other down, its crazy!

Milo, Milo, Milo... this kid is getting so old. he is beginning to ask us so many questions about EVERYTHING, science, god, death, and (gulp) babies. here we go!

this is Lola's newest face/trick. She has learned that if she does this, she will get allot of attention by everyone around her, so she does this to people at the grocery store, church the park, restaurants... everywhere! she loves attention! should I be nervous?

Oscar. he is such a mamas boy. He is constantly trying to get into places he shouldn't, this is the door to the master bath room, he will wait there till someone comes out and tries to force his way in! if he sees any bathroom door left open he will speed right over to it! and he is fast! (I feel like he has these jammies on in every picture I post of him? weird.)

This is the only blurry washed out picture I had of little Auggie now that is is warm outside. He is consonantly on his power wheels ( or as he like to call it his " Tron nota-cytol") he insists on wearing the helmet even though I don't make him and he tells me that his hair look like Thor?

Silly Lola

2011-06-02T22:32:00.000-07:00

Now that the babies have learned to pull themselves up on everything, I love when I go in to get them from their naps or in the morning, and they are peeking through the slats in the crib, Oscar has stopped doing it and stands and jumps instead of peeking, but Lola still just peeks through till we get her out. so cute.

Lola is also our best little sleeper, she sleeps longer and harder than Oscar. Here is proof, she has her pacifier imprinted on the side of her face, nothing phases this girl!

Memorial Day Snow!

2011-05-30T23:00:00.000-07:00

This was taken from out my front door this morning. YA, that's snow right in front of our house! it is nearly June and we have a fresh layer of snow!

wishing for sun.

OVERwhelmed. (and turning 32!)

2011-05-19T23:20:00.000-07:00

Even thinking about writing this post is stressing me out. I feel like I have so much going on right now, and I feel so guilty when I think about how much I have slacked on my blogging! I am going to do a quick bullet point and picture update...

Easter (ya... its been that long!)

We had a pleasantly typical Easter holiday, we went to church, dyed Easter eggs, ate too much candy, and celebrated the Resurrection of our Savior Jesus Christ. priceless.

Spring Soccer Season!

Auggie decided that he wanted to do a somersault in the middle of the soccer game? why not?

Both Milo And Auggie are in soccer right now, and between the two of them, we are swamped with practices and games! Milo's team has done really well and has only lost one game this whole season. Milo really enjoys playing goalie, and he has done really good at it! The babies love to come and cheer them on! Oscar just wants to get out on the field and play with all the big boys!

Back to School...
I decided to go back to school this semester. This is the first time I have been back since I was pregnant with the twins. i like to just go here and there and slowly plug away at some classes, my major id behavioral science with an emphasis in Family studies. I really enjoy the classes and find them useful in my everyday life. However, it is hard. hard to balance, homework, twins, a CRAZY 3 year old, Milo and HIS school, soccer, scouts, husband...well LIFE!! but it is the Summer semester so it is a little shorter than normal, lets hope I can do it!

Mothers Day

This is a picture of my Grandma, my Mom, my older Sister, Me, and my little Sister. I know, you can hardly tell we are related, right!? ;) Milo made me the sweetest card for Mothers day (as always, he is so good at that!) And we enjoyed a nice relaxing Sunday dinner at My older sisters in laws. good times.

The BIG 32!

That's right, last Monday, May 16th, I turned 32 years old. It feels a little weird that number sounds so old, but I don't "feel" that old? I have a continuous birthday week celebration that is still going on! Everyone has been so gracious and showered me with cards and gifts. My family took me out to Texas Roadhouse (i love a good burger) and I had to ride the saddle while they sang happy birthday to me (embarrassing) YEEE HAWW!

Babies...

I feel like they have really hit a growth spurt for their milestones! here are few new things happening:

BOTH of them are crawling everywhere! Oscars favorite spots to go are the Bathrooms (of course!) we always have to try and make sure the doors are closed, but when they are accidentally left open, he speeds on over to them, and he is quick! Lola is content with just following Oscar, she knows that he knows where all the good stuff is, and she is not quite as fast as he is, which is nice. Oscar loves to pull himself up on everything, Lola will do it occasionally but not as often as Oscar does. They both have taken some pretty bad falls, but that's what comes with this stage!

Oscar still just has his two bottom teeth, and little Lola only has ONE little lonely bottom tooth!? I think that it is so weird that the second one didn't follow right after the first? Both babies are loving FOOD! Especially Oscar! he will literally eat anything that you put in front of him and he will eat a ton! Lola is a Little more picky and tends to gag alto more if she doesn't like the texture. Both of them eat 3 jars of baby food a day, and then will usually eat dinner with us if it is something easy for them (like spaghetti, rice, potatoes, bread, quesadillas, corn etc..) and they of course love their little cereal snacks! their pediatrician gave us the go ahead to start implementing regular milk, but I am a little timid to start trying this yet, since they had so may problems with their tummies in the beginning, and Oscar is still on the "Sensitive" formula. So maybe soon I will dare try it?
Sleeping is going... ok? they are still not sleeping through the night, But since we are not feeding them in the night anymore, it makes it more handable, to not have to get up and totally wake up to feed them. right now they still wake up a few times in the night and cry for no apparent reason. very frustrating. yet still, better that where we were a few months ago...So I will not complain.

Their little personalities are starting to emerge, They love to poke at each other and torment each other. Lola could barely touch Oscar and he will wail in pain, but if Auggie body slams him to the ground he will squeal with delight (he really looks up to auggie and feels he can do wrong) Oscar can be so whiny, but so sweet when he giggles. Lola is so mellow tempered 99% of the time and she loves to "talk" and "sing" she is contend just playing with her toes or watching t.v. she is mesmerized by watching people sing. Both babies love the older boys right now, and Milo is such a good helper when it comes to keeping them entertained.

I love this sweet face.

Well! that is my life is a mad nutshell right now. Wish me luck as I try to survive the next few weeks!

Homemade Fruit Leather

2011-04-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

I have had a few people ask me for this recipe, This is from Russ' mom who has been making this for many years, so I thought it would be fun to post it here. This is a main staple in our home, I make this recipe at least every other week! I use a food dehydrator to make this, but i know that their are ways to do it in your regular oven.

(I just noticed that you can get the exact food dehydrator that I have on cabelas.com for only 99.00! thats a great deal! it does alot more than just fruit leather)

For this specific batch, I used canned fruit, however, in the summer months I like to use fresh fruit or you can use a mixture of both.

My favorite combination is Peaches, Pears, Apricots and Applesauce.

You will need:

4 cans of peaches
1 can of pears
1 can of apricots
1 cup of applesauce

All of these ingredients, will fill one blender full. In order to make a entire batch to fill all 20 fruit leather trays, I need to do 3 blenderfuls.

Drain out the juices of the canned peaches, pears and apricots.

The key to getting a soft fruit leather that doesn't crack is the applesauce, I add one cup per every blender-full of fruit. (unless you cook it to long, than it will be hard and crack anyway!)

Place all the ingredients in the blender, and blend till all the fruit is made into a liquid form.

make sure you blend it enough, so that there aren't any chunks in the mixture.

Pour the mixture into the trays designated for your dehydrator. I spray a very thin coat of cooking spray on the trays before I pour the mixture on.

With the back of a spoon push the mixture to all the edges of the tray and spread it evenly across the tray to not allow and parts of the tray to show through.

Place the small fruit leather trays onto the trays that go in the food dehydrator. I can fit two fruit leather trays per one dehydrator tray.

Place all your prepared trays into the dehydrator. set the temperature to the manufactures recommended setting and wait... For my dehydrator, I have to leave mine for about 10 hours. (I set up the dehydrator out in the garage so I don't really have to think about it, or hear the machine running for that long)

Once the fruit leather is dry and not squishy to the touch, remove it from the dehydrator and peel it off of the tray. I then cut that strip into three smaller strips, that are a good snack size.

After I remove then from the trays and cut then into strips, I place them in a Ziploc bag to keep them soft. I really cant tell you how long they will last, because like I said, we go through a batch this size every other week!

Sleeping Twins... and pictures of course!

2011-04-20T22:14:00.000-07:00

I cant even believe that I am writing a post about my babies actually sleeping, and not about how tired I am! So I took a little bit of every ones comments and different stuff I read, and came up with my own plan of attack. It basically was to feed the babies as much as possible before bed, and putting them to bed a little earlier, and not feeding them till morning. It went alot smother than planned, I was expecting alot of crying since the babies were used to eating every 4 hours in the night, but, surprisingly they cried about the same amount of time that they were crying while they were eating in the night! It took about 3 to 4 nights of them waking up and wanting to eat every 4 hours, and I would let them cry for 10 min, then go in and re-situate them and give them their pacifier, and walk out and then time 15 min, and do the same thing, and increase the time by 5 min each time. however I never had to do it longer than 20 min and each night it got a little shorter. Now I'm not saying that everynight has been perfect, there are still nights where they wake, and I have to let them cry a little, but it is usually no longer than about 5 or 10 min. But it is a HUGE improvement to where we were a couple weeks ago! it is so nice to not have to worry about feeding them in the night anymore!

Here is our new and improved night time schedule:

7:30- tub time, jammies on.
7:50- Rock Oscar, feed 6oz bottle with rice cereal in it
7:55- Oscar goes to bed
8:00- Rock Lola, feed 6oz bottle with rice cereal in it
8:05- Lola goes to bed

8:05-8:00am- SLEEP!!! (occasionally one or both will wake, and I do the 10 min cry time, and they will usually fall back asleep..)

8:00am- Wake up!

Plus they are still taking a 2 hour morning nap, and an 1 1/2 hour afternoon nap.

I'm sure that this will change (in fact, both babies have the stomach flu right now, but so far it hasn't affected their sleep to much) But for now, I am happy with how things have turned out, and I couldn't have done it without all the help I received from all my bloggy friends! thank you.

Now for my classic picture post to recap our last week:

Oscar has decided to pull himself up on everything! this is how I find him every morning (and sometimes in the night.) silly boy.

Both Babies have the funniest little tuft of hair growing right on the top of their head! Lola's is usually covered by a bow, but it is the cutest thing!

I think I have pictures like this of all of our kids... Dad loves it! I love the last picture, he seriously was so happy the whole time, I kind of wish someone could do that to me... wheeeee!

Me and the Kiddos, they are getting so big, pretty soon I wont be able to hold them both!

Love these crazy boys. (who majorly need haircuts)

Lola, and her Victoria's Secret pose. Grrrr Baby! work it!

!!!!!!!!!WARNING!!!!!!!!!

these next pictures may seem totally disgusting to you. But, if you have ever been a mother or even have been around children for an extended period of time, I'm sure you have images like these burned into your mind!

Remember me saying both babies have the stomach flu......

It started with Lola.... and here is the proof.

yep. I warned you. jealous much?

And if that wasn't enough... check out this video of my surround sound cry-fest. lets just hope this stomach bug leaves QUICK!!

Quick Photo Update

2011-04-10T22:29:00.000-07:00

Ok, I don't have time to do a "real" post, But I just had to give a quick update... and of course, pictures help make my humdrum life seem a little more fascinating!

- I am happy to report, we are having MAJOR improvement on the sleep situation here! I will write a full post later, but lets just say, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel! yay me! but I couldn't have done it without all the helpful comments, THANK YOU!!

- Other big news... Oscar is officially crawling! he decided the army crawl wasn't getting him around fast enough and decided to kick it into high gear and go for it! not only is he crawling, but he is trying to pull himself up on everything! which is causing some bumps on the head, here we go!

- We have had a busy week, with some walks, (when the crazy weather decided to cooperate) this is a picture of the babies first walk outside in the stroller, they loved being outside! I can not wait for the weather to warm up!

- Auggie is driving me crazy! This kid has so much energy, I really need to find a way to harness it and use it to my benefit.. (like to pull the car, so we can save money on gas? just a thought...) But he says the cutest things, and loves to sing. His favorite song is "all the small things" by Blink 182, to hear his little voice sing all the words is just adorable!

- Milo, Milo, Milo... really, the sweetest, kindest, most thoughtful, tender-hearted kid you could ever meet. He is so talented and artistic. However, he is struggling so hard with his spelling and reading! I have talked to his teacher and expressed my concerns, but she doesn't seem to be as worried as I am about it. We have the biggest struggles during homework time, that one of us usually ends up in tears about it. I don't know if he needs a tutor, or if I just need to learn how to teach him better? He has a really hard time focusing, but only when it comes to spelling or reading, he is excellent at math. does anyone out there know of any teaching tactics that I could try with him? books to read? tutor for hire? ugh.

- I made a bouquet for my sister-in-law's winter wedding, She is getting married on the top of a mountain, and skiing down in her wedding dress! I cant wait to see the pictures! These were just some picture I took with my camera...

- I really am having to much fun with a little girl. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my boys, but I love playing dress up with my little Lola, she is such a good sport!

It is Spring break this week, and we have ZERO plans! I better get creative real quick, or we are going to go crazy!

Thank You! And the Plan...

2011-04-05T22:27:00.000-07:00

I cannot even express how thankful I am to everyone who responded to my "sleep" post! That is exactly what I was hoping for. I needed to hear ideas, things that worked, things that didn't work. I think I have come up with a plan of attack... I really am thinking that the quickest way to get the best results, is going to be.... wait for it.... CIO. I know I said that I wanted to stay away from that, but after reading all your comments and doing a bit of research, I think that I am looking for fast results, and that seems to work the best. BUT, in order for me to feel comfortable while doing that, I need to purchase some video baby monitors. Several times when I have gone in there at night, I have found them with their arm stuck under the bumper and through the railing, or their favorite blanket all tangled around them, so I feel like if I could see them in the middle of their cry-fest and know that they are not in any danger, then I can feel a little, just a little, better about letting them CIO. So My husband supported me in my neurotic idea, and ordered some video monitors from Costco. The only problem with that, is that they wont be here for a few days!
So my question now is, is there anything I could be working on in the meantime? I was thinking about doing a few things till we did the CIO when the monitors came:

- First off, I think I will push their bed time a little earlier, like have them in bed by 7:30.
- Next, I liked the idea of doing the dream feed around 10:00, that way if when they do get up later, I will know that they are not starving.
-No more night-feeds. since we will be doing the dream feed I am going to trust that they are good enough to go all night without eating.
- When they do get up in the night, I will continue to what I have done before, and let them try to work it out themselves starting with 15 min, and working the time up from there.

I think that if I start out with those things until I get the monitors, it will make it an easier transition for the shock of the CIO nights.... I hope? I don't know why, this is such a big ordeal to me? I never had to do anything this drastic, or thought out with my other boys? maybe I'm just being over dramatic? or maybe the exhaustion is getting the best of me? I just really need to get this under control.

also.... Some of you had asked what our daytime schedule was like so I thought I would post it.

8:30-9:00am : Wake up
9:00am : eat 1 jar of baby food each mixed with a little mixed grains
9:30am : have a 6oz bottle
9:30 to 11:00am : Play time! which consists of jumpers, walkers, tummy scooting everywhere!
11:00 to 1:00pm: I make them 2 more ounces to top them off before nap, I feed them and put them in bed and they usually always sleep 2 hours for this nap.
1:00pm : wake up, eat cereal snacks while auggie eats lunch
1:30pm : have an 8 oz bottle this usually takes them a while to eat. they kind of eat, play, eat, play..
1:30 - 3:30pm : PLAY! this is the time, we would go for a walk if the weather is nice, or I take all the kids to the grocery store = chaos.
3:30pm : Nap time, this nap is usually 1 1/2 hours, but sometimes can be 2 hours
5:00pm : wake up, eat 1 jar of baby food each mixed with some rice cereal OR if we make something baby friendly for dinner they will have a little of that.

5:30 - 7:30pm : have a 6 oz bottle play, play, play...

7:30pm : Tubs... start bedtime routine...

Lets hope that I can get these books off the night stand for a while... I'm sick of them.

Well maybe not ALL of them. I need that last one (Beyond Time Out) for this crazy kid, that will be in an upcoming post.. one thing at a time. It never ends! geeez!

Auggie in his mid-dance pose. Always moving, always naked.
love. this. kid.

Sleep... Please Help!

2011-04-04T22:17:00.000-07:00

We need major help. I am completely clueless on how to get these babies to sleep through the night, or even 4 straight hours would be nice! I have read to much, tried to much, that I think it has been more detrimental to their sleeping than helpful. We have never been die hard Ferber fans. I prefer a less harsh approach, but this has not been working for us this time around. So we are seriously contemplating putting them to sleep and not going in their rooms at all till morning, which is a huge commitment. that means you are going to hear your children cry for unlimited hours in the night. I cant take it, it breaks my heart, but I really don't know what to do at this point. This no-sleep is really wearing on all of us in this house. But before I embark on this dreaded feat, I thought I would share what our night time currently involves, and see if any of you all-wise mommas out there have any other options or suggestions for me to try? please.

7:30pm
Tub-time, bathe babies and get Jammie's on.

8:00pm
I take Oscar into his room with a bottle, and rock him, feed him, love him, put him in his crib. ( he is usually awake when I put him down, but occasionally he falls asleep while I am rocking him)

8:15pm
Lola's turn to go to bed, same as Oscar... rock ,feed, love. put her in her crib.

10:30pm
Oscar usually wakes up around this time and is SCREAMING! I wait about 15 min to see if he will just go back to sleep on his own (occasionally he does) after the 15 min, I go in and re situate him because he is usually all turned around at the bottom of his crib, I give him his pacifier, pat him on the back, and walk out.

* sometimes that's all he needed, and other nights he does this for about an hour. I increase my wait time by 5 minutes each time I go in, so 15 min the first time, 20 the next, 25 the next....

12:30am
Oscar wakes up, and I feed him he eats about 4 oz. I put him back to bed and he will go right back to sleep or talk for a little bit (like 5 or 10 min).

1:30am
Lola wakes up, I feed her, she eats about 4 oz. and I put her back to bed, she falls right back asleep or talks for a little bit, but doesn't cry.

3:30am
Oscar will most likely wake up around this time and cry, hard! I do that same thing that I do when he wakes up at 10:30 15min then 20, then 25.... he usually falls back asleep after 30 min of that. usually.

4:30am
Oscar wakes up again, so I feed him again. he eats another 4 oz. and I put him back to bed, he falls asleep.

5:00am
Lola wakes up, feed her, she eats about 4 oz. put her back to bed, she falls asleep.

5:00-8:00 am
most nights, one of the babies will wake up somewhere in between this time and we will end up putting them in their swings , because by this point we are so exhausted that I don't care where they are as long as they are not crying!

8:30am
Babies wake up.

some more information that may be helpful to know:
- they both sleep in their own rooms right now, because Oscars crying was waking up Lola...
- they take two naps a day right now one at 11:00am for 2 hours and one at 3:30ish pm for about 1 and a half hours.

Like I said, WE NEED HELP! I am so done with this night time routine. I am open to any and all suggestions! i. need. sleep.

Sleepless in Utah

p.s. While writing this Oscar has woken up two separate times why!?

8 months old!

2011-03-30T21:38:00.000-07:00

Here we are 8 months into this crazy mess called twins. Part of me cant believe we are already at 8 months, and the other part of me wishes it was more like 18 months! It definitely is getting a little easier... a little. Oscar just cut his first tooth 3 days ago! I would like to think that I could attribute that to his "grouchy" demeanor, but I really think that is just his personality :( He is just more needy, whiny, and high maintenance... kind of like his daddy ;) And Lola is just a dream baby compared to Oscar (we still love you osckie) She will just lay on a blanket and be completely content with playing with her toes and cooing! she sleeps better than Oscar, which is a whole different post to come. I need some major help in the sleep situation here.
Lola is a great little sitter but she doesn't seem to be to interested in crawling yet. she just gets on her belly and spins circles, its pretty cute. But Oscar, he is SO close to crawling! he gets on his hands and knees and rocks back and forth and kind of does a little hop and then plops back down on his belly and army crawls to where he wants to go, which is usually wherever Auggie (3) is. those two are going to be troub.le.

I have so many pictures taken in the last month that are to cute not to share! so bear with me with I overwhelm you with pure cuteness...

Banana Time!

We call this face the "Evil Twin" it is seriously the scariest face and it happens all the time!

These are cute little knit boots handmade by Aunt Liz. Aren't they the cutest things you've ever seen!?

got back fat?
YES!

Cute onesies made by a girl I used to babysit.

That's all for now. peace out.

Giveaway WINNERS!

2011-03-30T20:53:00.000-07:00

The Lucky winners are...

Congratulations to:

Commenter # 9 Sonja

Commenter #3 Julia

Email me cyndilowry@gmail.com or leave me your email address and I can send you all the choices!

thanks to everyone else for entering! I wish I could let everyone win! if you would like a discount code for an online order feel free to email me and I will see what I can do for you!

Check this out! Crazy!

2011-03-30T10:17:00.001-07:00

This device will allow you to see your unborn child while in your belly!
Part of me finds it a little weird, and part of me says "where can I get one!"
Read more about it here:
http://www.tuvie.com/prevue-fetal-visualization-device-by-melody-shiue/#more-18849

posted from Bloggeroid

Baby Bling Bows Giveaway!!

2011-03-24T22:22:00.000-07:00

OK. So I have been working for this company Baby Bling for a few years now. We create the most amazingly comfortable, stylish headbands for babies, infants and toddlers. we have recently come out with two new headband styles, and in celebration of this, I am going to give away one of them to two lucky readers! All you need to do to be entered, is become a follower of my blog AND go to our Baby Bling Facebook page and "like" us! and them leave me a comment here telling me you did both of those and I will enter you in the drawing! that's it! You will get to chose one of the new styles and I will mail it to you! Why would you not do this!?

I will announce the winner in one week, on: Thursday, March 31st! I will computer generate the winner and post it here on that day, and you will have 2 days to leave me your email address so I can get your mailing address!

Here are the two new styles (on the most beautiful baby girl in the world... ok, so I might be a little biased)

The Bouquet
Shown in Spring . Also comes in Pink, Whites and Purple.

The Frenchie

Shown in black. Also comes in White and Pink.

You can also visit out website to find retailers in your area!

Happy Blogging!

ICLW welcome!

2011-03-23T22:17:00.000-07:00

Hi, My Name is Cyndi

A little bit about me...
Hang on, grab a chair, this was longer than I thought...

I met my husband in high school. However, we were not high school sweethearts ( he asked me to prom and I said no...) he was a long haired, football playing, motorcycle/Camaro driving punk. And I was an innocent little sophomore who knew her mom would never approve. Fast forward a few years, and while at church, from across the way I see this clean-cut glowing return missionary, and from that moment I knew he was the one. And so we didn't waste any time, really. we went on our first date in July and we were married September 5th 1998 only two months!

We both knew immediately that we wanted a family, so it began. and we were told that it could take 6 months to a year.. you know the drill. A year went by, and nothing. So I really pulled out the big guns, and started temping, and timing and charting, hoping, praying, wishing.... nothing. and come to find out I was never even ovulating! My Dr. prescribed Clomid and we thought, this is it! this is going to work and we are going to have twins! hmmm...not so much. we were so limited on funds and we were starving students living in Hawaii that we just continued to do the clomid, for 2 whole years! (I don't think it is meant to be used that way?) So my Dr. finally said that I could only do 1 more month of clomid then we would have to try another avenue. And guess what! BFP! we were shocked! I had a good pregnancy till 36 weeks when I developed pre-eclampsia and had to be induced. And after 18 hours of labor and 3 hours of pushing! we welcomed our first son Milo, in July 2002.

After the birth of our son, everyone said "oh! now you will get pregnant right away, your body just had to get pregnant once" Really? really? so we went right back into trying for #2. We tried the clomid again for another 3 years (off and on) Then I was finally diagnosed with PCOS, I was given metformin and told that I would probably get pregnant once I take that for about 6 months and get my PCOS under control.. nope. I went through the homeopathic route, and tried every herb and concoction that everyone swore worked for a Friend of a friend... nothing. By this point our son was turning 5 and I was beginning to lose hope. We had even put our adoption papers in, we wanted to keep all options out on the table. We finally took the plunge and went to a RE and did IUI #'s 1,2,3 and 4 only to find out each time that I never ovulated even with the meds.? So we were told that our only option at that point was IVF. So we saved our precious pennies, and went for it! They retrieved 46 eggs! and 28 of those fertilized! I had a case of OHSS which held off the transfer to day 5 instead of day 2 or 3. By that point of the 28 embryos only 6 survived to blastocysts, so we transferred 2... and 2 weeks later BFP! there was a good beginning of pregnancy, then I had to be put on bedrest at 30 weeks due to pregnancy induced hypertension, and ultimately was induced at 35 weeks due to the hypertension, and gave birth to beautiful baby boy August in January of 2008.

Once again came the responses " I bet NOW, your body will get pregnant, because I know someone who knew someone Else's sisters, cousin who got pregnant on their own after they did IVF" ya, ok. We were smart enough to know not to waste our time with clomid this time, and we had 4 embryos left from the last retrieval and we wanted more kids so just 11 months after our last baby was born we did another transfer with 2 of the remaining embryos, I thought for sure it would work, and since it worked the first time around it HAD to work this time, BFN. I was crushed, but I knew we had 2 more frozen embryos left, so the very next month later we did it again with our last remaining embryos... BFN! what!? I was shocked. Hurt, confused, hopeless. I didn't know what we were suppose to do, how could we afford another 20 grand on IVF again? We decided we needed a little break. Time to enjoy the kids we had. So the next year around the same time, we were able to get some money together and found a new less expensive RE, and went for it again! This time I had some OHSS but not as severe as last, and my RE was adamant that day 2 transfers are the secret to successful transfers, who am I do question what he does best? so we all agreed that with my history we would transfer 3 embryos. It was one of the worst 2WW I had ever had, I had convinced myself everyday that it did not work, I was a mess, just ask my husband he will agree! but luckily, I was wrong! BFP and not only was I pregnant, but it was TWINS! most of that journey is documented here in this blog, but in a nutshell I was put on bedrest at 30 weeks due to preterm labor, and had a emergency c-section at 34 weeks. We welcomed our little twins Oscar and Lola in July 2010. They spent 6 weeks in the nicu, and are getting bigger and more work everyday!

Here we are 12 years into this crazy thing called marriage. Just trying to figure out how to raise our kids right, and still remain best Friends while doing so.

So join me here in my daily grind of life with me, my husband an 8 year old, the craziest 3 year old in the world and 7 month old twins!

I am not the best updater, But I try.

Still alive...

2011-03-14T09:18:00.001-07:00

Im happy to report we all survived the sick-fest that infested our home! We have just been sticking around home, slowly transitioning back into normal life again. I am hoping to be able to pick back up on blogging again, but for now here are some pictures from the past few weeks...

posted from Bloggeroid

Frowny Face

2011-03-06T11:39:00.001-08:00

sick.

Don't be jealous...

2011-03-02T10:55:00.001-08:00

Where have I been?

Monday: took auggie (3 year old) to the dr. and found out he had croup.

Tuesday: babies started to seem a little sick.

Wednesday: took babies in to the dr. and found out they also had croup. Of course!

Thursday: babies had a rough night, started lots of wheezing. Took them back to the dr. to find out they both have rsv. Oscar is admitted to the hospital. Lola is treated at home and at the hospital for suctioning.

Late that night auggies ear drum ruptures.....what! The one night that I am not home with him!?

Friday: oscar comes home!

Saturday, sunday: continue breathing treatments and hospital suctioning... And lots of love.

Monday: take auggie to the ENT because his ear is ozzing, yuck! Find out that he has strep! Yougottabefreakinkiddingme!

Tuesday: take babies back to the dr. for rsv follow up...are you ready?....both babies have ear infections! Bring it on.

Insert crying from just about everyone in this house inbetween all of that, and you pretty much have my last few weeks.

Don't be jealous.

posted from Bloggeroid

Hospitalization...

2011-02-24T22:49:00.001-08:00

It seemed to good to be true that we could escape this winter season without someone getting really sick..
. Poor little oscar is staying the night on the hospital tonight. A few days ago he had got croup (most likley from his 3 year old brother who has had the worst case of croup for the past 7 days!) but even after a few doses of the steroid her just still wasnt doing the best, he was still really wheazzy and his cough started to sound more mucousy...and now lola stated to sound wheazzy. So I took them both on to the dr. today and after listening to both of them and doing some breathing treatments, it was decided that poor little oscar was just struggling to hard to breathe and would need to stay in the hospital to be treated and monitored. And little miss lola had to be taken to the hospital to get suctioned and tested for rsv. I really hope she can stay home and not have to come here too. So we are here for tonight and hopefully things can go well so we can go home tommorow! It is so hard leaving all my other kids at home. Milo cried when her heard I had to stay, it just breaks my heart! But I know that I will do whatever it takes to get oscar safe and healthy again. This is not fun.

posted from Bloggeroid

6 months old

2011-02-11T15:36:00.001-08:00

The babies had their 6 month check up today (a little late...) They are growing and healthy! They are reaching all their milestones and now they are officially off the Elecare! Oscar still has to have the sensitive similac, but we can handle that!

Here are their 6 month stats:

Oscar
Height: 25.75" 19th percentile
Weight: 15.03lbs 8th percentile
Head: 17.25 45th percentile

Lola
Height: 25.5" 33rd percentile
Weight: 14.01lbs 11th percentile
Head: 17 66th percentile

And some more pictures fotr your viewing pleasure.....

The older boys just couldn't resist a photo shoot on mom and dads bed!

posted from Bloggeroid

Giggles

2011-01-31T10:32:00.000-08:00

No one can get oscar to giggle quite like Auggie can, this is so cute! they are such good brothers, most of the time...

Switching formulas

2011-01-28T21:31:00.001-08:00

So the twins have been on elecare ever since they had there NEC scare in the nicu when they were about 4 weeks old. They have seemed to handle it really well, and haven't had many issues with spitting up or acid reflux. However I started to wonder it maybe it had anything to do with their poor sleeping habits? So I consulted Dr. Google, and come to find out others who were using elecare have had some of the same issues we have been having. I guess that the way the formula helps with the stomach problems is by breaking down quicker so that the body digests it faster and gives the sensitive intestines time to heal. Well since it was digesting so much quicker they were probably getting hungry more often than I was feeding them (in the night) So! Basically, during those awful 2 1/2 hour CIO sessions, I was pretty much starving them to death! Geez! How many other kids do I have? Mother of the year! AND, they have had diarrhea since we brought them home from the NICU we even took them to the GI and they were puzzled by it. But as I read more I found out that diarrhea is also another side effect of elecare (something I thought their Dr.or GI would have known?) So, I called their pediatrician and aasked them what they thought about switching formulas, and they said that we could try half elecare and half regular formula! So yesterday we started doing half elecare and half similac sensitive. I don't think it is coincidence, they are now eating 9 ounces each feed! 9! They used to only eat 5 or 6 just a few days ago! They love this stuff! And so far they seem to be tolerating it fine, and their diarrhea has also improved a little, it at least now isn't complete water. Now hopefully they can start getting full bellies and sleeping through the night! Right?

posted from Bloggeroid

Sleep

2011-01-25T09:45:00.000-08:00

The babies are nearing six months old, and only one of them has ever slept through the night, only once! They each will wake up randomly a few times a night, there is no rhyme or reason to the times they wake up, I have tried charting them and have found no pattern whatsoever! We are very sure to never let them fall asleep while eating or being held, we try to get them to bed at the same time every night, and they only take two naps in the day totaling about 3 to 4 hours. So we finally, after being totally exhausted, decided to just let them cry it out, if it had been less than four hours before they last ate. The first night they cried for 2 and a half hours straight. I'm not exaggerating at all, we watched the clock the entire time! It was horrible. And once they finally stopped, lola woke up after only being asleep for about 20 minutes, but since it had been a little over for hours since she had last ate, I fed her. Was that the right thing to do, or am I just teaching her that she has to cry for two hours for me to finally feed her? I don't know. But at that time of night it made since to me. So after that first night we thought the crying time would decrease a little? Wrong. Same amount of crying only at some totally different time in the night! So here is the big question I have, should I not have them in the same room together? Because one always starts crying before the other and inevitably wakes the other one up. We don't even have another rom on the main level to put one in a different room, but I thought we could maybe put a pack n play in our walk in closet, just til we get this sleep training over with? Is that pointless? Am I just training one to sleep in a different environment and going to have to re train them later? I am really desperate here.

I love these kids... But if mommy and daddy don't get some sleep soon, you may be visiting us at the looney bin!

Coming up to breathe... for a minute.

2011-01-18T20:04:00.000-08:00

whew! has it really been that long? I feel like I am never going to get out of this thick haze called 2 new babies! we have been battling the sickness train for about 2 months now and the babies have had multiple ear infections requiring several antibiotics and finally 3 doses of the rocephin shot, and once that finally cleared, within a few days they both got croup and almost had to be hospitalized but luckily just had to have a few breathing treatments and be suctioned at the hospital. The croup cleared up after a few days but their poor little noses just had so much mucus it was hard for them to eat or breath! So we did EVERYTHING we could think of to help them, propped up the head of their cribs, constantly ran a cool mist humidifier, vapor baths... but the best thing that we found to help was using a little saline spray up their noses and we bought this electric nasal aspirator which is AMAZING! I was really sceptical and it looks and sounds a little scary, but it really pulls all of the mucus out (I know, only something a mother could be proud of... gross!) anywho. For right now all the sickness seems to be at a stand still for now.

On a happier note, the babies are growing like crazy! they have their 6 month check up coming up at the end of this month so I will post those when I get them. they are finally eating better!!! It has been such a hard struggle but they are finally eating at least 6 oz. four times a day, which is a huge improvement! I wish I could say such great results for their sleeping at night :( they are still getting up at least two times each in the night, and I have been letting them do their own thing in the night and not keep them on the same schedule, which sometimes works well because Lola will usually sleep a little longer than Oscar, but usually it just means that I am waking up 4 different times through the night to feed. I am open to any suggestions anyone has to help ease this a little?

I could go on and on about theses sweet little babies, but I am luck to even have a second to write this! Auggie just turned Three and is crazier than ever! he is such a handful right now! and Milo is eight and we are constantly swamped in all his homework, and its only third grade!

I wanted this.

But this is hard.

pictures that help it seem a little better...

Babies first attempt at eating rice cereal... didn't go so well. Maybe Oscar didn't like it because he had to wear a girl bib?

A little tummy time.

All the kids after tub (hence the messy hair)

babies after church

Where you can find me almost all day!

Mommy and Lola, thanksgiving day.

Halloween & Blessing Day

2010-11-09T22:53:00.000-08:00

Thing 1 (Oscar) and Thing 2 (Lola)

The Babies are doing good, we have had some sickness around and I think they got a little stomach bug which was no fun. The only issue we are dealing with right now is their slow eating! It takes them about an hour to finish off 4 ounces! and most of the time they dont even finish thtat much! they are only eating about every 4 to 5 hours (if I try and wake them any sooner to eat they freak out and wont eat more than an ounce) so they are only eating about 16 ounces a day, and everything I have read says they should be eating around 24 ounces a day!? I would really like to start training them to sleep through the night, but I feel like they need to be eating more to do that? yes? no? Other than that they seem to be doing well? they are really begining to communicate and smile alot! they are so much fun!

Halloween & Babies Blessings

2010-11-09T21:55:00.000-08:00

Things have been crazy!.... but fun! The babies are doing good and we all had a fun Halloween despite the rain. The Boys were able to go out and still get way to much candy, while me and the babies stayed home and handed out "scarrots" (bags of baby carrots!) Milo was so embarrassed he said he didn't want to be here when kids came so they didn't see that we were handing out carrots instead of candy! it was pretty funny to see every ones reaction when they realized it was carrots, some kids wouldn't even take them! it was a "trick" and a "treat"!

We also Blessed the babies this week, they were really great blessings and we had a little family get-together after, which was lots of fun and chaos! My friend Nicole made Lola's blessing dress, it is SO cute! I almost didn't get any pictures of them in their clothes, because they got so cranky after everyone left that I just wanted to put them to bed! but we managed to get a few..

And just for fun.........

"Hair-laroius"

just a few...

2010-10-18T13:46:00.000-07:00

I just HAD to post a few pictures from the babies first photo shoot. I am still working on getting their announcment mailed out! so if you want one leave me your address and I will send one to you! but for now... enjoy!

Babies first photo shoot!

2010-09-29T08:33:00.000-07:00

I just have to post some of the photo shoot we had with the twins! this is only a few of the bunch, there are so many cute ones! we had our friend katie at Peekaboo take their pictures just days after we came home from the nicu, so they are 5 weeks old in these. enjoy!

Random pictures

2010-09-20T20:23:00.001-07:00

I dont really have much time to do a big update (big suprise right?) so I thought I would just post some random pictures for fun!

Lola and a little smile...

Oscar and his super excited look!

Milo and Auggie.... ya.

Oscar and Lola LOVE loungin in the Boppys!

Home!!!

2010-09-04T20:37:00.001-07:00

I cant believe it! after 36 long days in the NICU we were able to bring home our babies! it was just like everyone told me, "once they get "it" you will be out so quick" and that's just how it was, the Dr. changed their feeds to "on demand" which is pretty much what you would do at home right? and after a whole day and night of that he said "come and get them, their ready!" and here we are home at last with our beautiful babies which are just heavenly and are already on the most perfect schedule!

HOME!!

2010-09-04T20:17:00.000-07:00

me and oscar (no wires and tubes!!!!!)

One Month Old!!! still in NICU...

2010-08-30T21:32:00.000-07:00

Oscar and Lola turned 1 month old today!! they are still in the NICU :( but continuing to improve....slowly. Oscar now weighs 5lbs 14oz and Lola weighs 5lbs 12 oz, they are getting so big! They are still just struggling to eat, without getting distracted or falling asleep.
Till then, we will just celebrate the month we have had with these sweet babies and treasure all the fun times which we will have in the near future when we get to bring them home!

Oscar and his "I see dead people" face...

Lola working in that bottle, she is such a picky eater and has to be layed on a boppy on her side or she totally freaks out and acts like a drama queen! (but we still love her)

Lola starving, Oscar chillin'

Some of the nuses decorated their crib for their 1 month birthday! it was so cute, all the "streamers" were done with medical tape! :) so funny!

A little note from "lola" because she had to change out of her special onesie because she peed on it!

Twins 1 month old! First day of school!

2010-08-30T21:08:00.000-07:00

Till then, we will just celebrate the month we have had with these sweet babies and treasure all the fun times which we will have in the near future when we get to bring them home!

I made them these little onesies to celebrate their first month... of course Lola peed on hers before the day was even half over!

Lola and her googly eyes.

Oscar without his tube!!! (because he ripped it out! and then ripped Lolas out too! they finally had to put socks on his hands and then he learned how to get the socks off so they finally taped them on!)

Milos first day of school (3rd grade) he refused to wear any of the new clothes I got him? Russ and I have decided... 8 year olds are weird.

Auggie outside of his preschool class! he was so excited!

And of course.... the classic auggie picture. ok, 2 year olds are weird too.

3 weeks old... still in the NICU

2010-08-22T20:00:00.001-07:00

Poor little Lola and Oscar, Still not home! I really am ready for them to be here in our home. we had a little step backward this week, which made us have to pretty much start all over with feedings again! they both had a little problem with their stomachs, so we needed to stop all feedings and hook them back up to IVs to let their stomachs rest and recover for a while. it was so sad because we have been trying to train them to eat, and then we just stop, they were a little used to getting fed and having full belly's, that you could tell they were hungry! it was so heartbreaking to watch! after a bunch of tests and x-rays the doctors feel that it is ok to start them slowly back on to tube feedings again, but we have to slowly do this, so it does not irritate their stomachs anymore. So.... little step back, hopefully it wont take us long to get back to where we were!? man we love these little kiddos!

NICU day 20...

2010-08-18T20:37:00.000-07:00

I can honestly say, I really didn't think they would still be in the NICU! We are just having the hardest time getting these two little ones to take their feeding through a bottle! they haven't even accomplished their first step of taking two feedings a day through a bottle, they don't even finish it half way!? Lola acts like she is going to just die with every uncontrollable gulp! and Oscar takes it so calm and slowly that he falls asleep before he can even get halfway done! Other than that they are healthy growing babies! Lola weighs 5lbs3oz and Oscar weighs 5lbs2oz! I cant tell you how many times i hear from the nurses and Dr's (which all have been amazing!) give it some more time and they will just take off! but I am feeling like we are going to be celebrating their first birthday there! so if anyone out there has some pointers on feeding lazy babies...do tell!

Almost 2 weeks old!

2010-08-12T20:28:00.001-07:00

I Cant believe that these little babies will be 2 weeks old tomorrow! they have changed so much! they are slowly but surely improving. They are still in the NICU, but are generally really healthy! they aren't on any oxygen, but they just need to learn to eat without the feeding tube. they need to be able to eat all their feeds through a bottle... and right now, they don't even do half a feed through their twice a day feedings! so we are working on it. everyday they seem to do a little better. so hopefully in a few more weeks we can have them come home!

The Story... and pictures!

2010-08-02T20:15:00.000-07:00

Before... I had no idea what was coming!

On Friday July 30th (34 weeks and 4 days) we went into our regular scheduled MFM appt. to get a Doppler and a NST, that evening before was a horrible night, I was up all night with really bad stomach pains, indigestion, acid, and back pain but I had eaten nachos at 10:00 at night so I figured that was probably the cause? When I woke up that morning I had some bright red bleeding which I had never had this whole pregnancy? So we went into our MFM appt and they did a Doppler to make sure the blood flow was still good and the first thing we saw was BABY A HAD FLIPED! So I was beginning to think my bad case of indigestion was actually a baby flipping around wedging his butt right into my cervix! We couldn’t even believe it! I was so excited for a vaginal delivery! During the NST it showed I was having steady contractions every 2 min, but that was kind of normal for me except this time my back was hurting really bad! So they sent me to Labor and Delivery to be more closely monitored. Once I got there they checked me, and I was still at a 3.5 and about 80% effaced but they could feel the bag of waters bulging. They gave the news to my Dr. who said due to the baby A bottom being wedged in the birth canal we could go forever and not dilate because his head is not there to out pressure in my cervix. So he decided right then and there we would do a c-section! I sent my husband home to grab the camera, because we had nothing with us! Luckily we live about 5 min away from the hospital because they rushed me so fast in to the operating room that I kept panicking and saying “wait for my husband!” they gave me a spinal block, and I really thought I was going to pass out! I couldn’t breath<>

So here we are... I am home now; the babies are still in the NICU. It is a little harder to leave them there than I thought it would be. But I know they are safe and getting what they need to be able to come home ASAP!

Dad and his "boys" Milo, Auggie and Oscar

The after shot like "what just happened!?"

Snuggle with Oscar!

Welcome Babies!

2010-07-31T11:19:00.001-07:00

Introducing...

Oscar Luis Lowry

4 lbs. 7oz. 16.5 inches

Lola Teresa Lowry

4 lbs. 12oz. 16.5 inches

Healthy, happy and oh so cute!

more news and details to come!

THEY ARE HERE!

2010-07-31T11:06:00.000-07:00

Whew that was CRAZY!

Introducing....

Oscar Luis Lowry 4 lbs 7oz, 16.5 inches

Lola Teresa Lowry 4 lbs 12oz, 16.5 inches

So far, healthy and happy!

more news and details to come!

34 WEEKS!!! still here! Twin belly timeline

2010-07-26T20:59:00.000-07:00

This is really a big milestone for us! I now am able to get off strict bed rest and move around a bit.. although my body is saying NO WAY! it is nice to get up and not feel like a total waste! at my 34 week check today I was dilated to a 3 and a half and 80% effaced, my Dr. bumped me down to my contraction medicine only every 8 hours instead of every 4, so now we just wait! I keep telling everyone, that I will probably be one of those people that gets off bed rest and then finally has to be induced at 38 weeks!

I thought this little timeline would be fun... enjoy!

here are the 34 week questions:

Total Weight Gain: holding steady at 29 pounds, not alot more room to put my food in!

Symptoms: pressure! some contractions... but alot of pressure! and very sore back!

Stretch Marks: Still none!

Sleep: never. toss and turn all night, which is one of the hardest things to do when it feels like your tummy weighs 100 pounds and is going to rip off with each turn!

Best Moment Last Week: both babies are now head down! but now I'm a little scared... what if I cant get them both out!?

Movement: Baby A has slowed down alot on his movement, but I feel like that is because he is so crammed down there he has no where to go!?

Cravings: Still.......Apples. Apples and Apples. and maybe crushed ice right now..mmmmm

What I Miss: Not being in so much pain everyday.

What am I looking forward to: getting these babies out of here! (when their ready of course..)

Milestones: 34 weeks!!! that was our goal! getting off of strict bed rest this week!

How is Daddy? So helpful! I couldn't have made it this far without all his help!

has it been that long?!

2010-07-25T21:58:00.001-07:00

Whew! I have been slacking on this blog! since there is no way I can blog everything that has happened from now since last time i blogged, I will just give a quick update...

baby news... Still cooking! I am at 34 weeks! I cant believe I have made it this far! I seriously feel like my body is falling apart! my back and my hips kill! but hey, it will all be worth it....right? I am feeling pretty prepared? We have our two cribs, two bassinets, two swings, two car seats, two rocking chairs..... you get the idea..TWO! still seems pretty unreal that we are close to having TWO babies that are going to throw us for one crazy ride!

( me, Milo and Lexi at Nana and Papas for a little firework fun! I know, I know I look like i have one of those huge exercise balls under my shirt!)

Milo, is turning 8 tomorrow! I cant even believe it! he is SO excited to get baptised this Saturday! (hopefully the babies will cooperate till then!) he is having a day of fun tomorrow, I will have to post pictures after! AND he decided he wanted to cut his hair! he looks so grown up!

Auggie... where do i begin!? he is definitely in the terrible 2 stage of life! and i can only imagine it might get a little worse when the babies come? but we love him to death anyway! even though he spends the majority of his day in timeout for hitting, pinching or yelling. its all just a phase.....right?...please?

(Milo, Russ and Auggie wearing there Argentine Jerseys that my mom brought back from Argentina.... cute boys!)

Russ, has been an allstar husband taking care of me, the boys, the house and work! while I have been on bed rest. I really am so lucky!

well I will hopefully be blogging more soon!

bedrest.

2010-07-17T22:19:00.000-07:00

Wow! I feel like so much has happened since my last post! I went for my bi-weekly NST and they did a Ffn test which came back positive, but i guess that, that only gives a small chance of delivering in the next two weeks? Then, I had my appt. with the MFM doc and tuns out that their must have been something wrong with the ultrasound machine at my Dr's office because both babies were in a perfectly fine range? (somewhere in the 20th percentile) their abdomens were measuring a little smaller than the rest of them but they weren't to concerned. they are both weighing in at approx 3lbs each! when I went in on Thursday for my NST I was having pretty steady contractions, so they gave me that horrid shot again that makes me all shaky, and that didn't stop them, so they gave me some other pill to try and stop them and they also checked my cervix and i was dilated to a 3 and 70% effaced! so after some more monitoring they sent me home with some medication to stop the contractions, that I take 3 times a day. and orders to be on strict bed rest.! BUT, they also said that once I hit 34 weeks I can be taken off the bed rest and off the medication! so until then, here I am, feeling completely helpless I know that staying down is what is best for the babies right now, but it is very hard when you have two other children to take care of! luckily I have the most supportive husband in the whole world! he really has bent over backwards to make sure I don't do a thing! both of our family's have really helped out too! we also live in such a great area and our neighbors have brought dinners by, taken the kids so my husband can work. I really feel so humbled and blessed to have such a good network of friends and family! more appts to come! here we go!

little nervous...

2010-07-10T16:38:00.000-07:00

I went in on Wednesday for my routine 31 week check up and ultrasound, and the Dr. did the measurements of the babies and discovered that the boy is in the 14th percentile and the girl is only in the 3rd percentile! so he is sending me to a Maternal Fetal medicine Dr. to do some more in depth monitoring for suspected IUGR, he didn't sound to alarmed, but when I got home and did some more research on IUGR it got me a little more nervous! the Dr. said there is just a good chance that she is just a small girl? My appointment isn't till Tuesday! I really hope everything goes well. I also was checked again that day and found out I am dilated to a 2.5 now! so they sent me over to labor and delivery for a NST and saw that i was having regular contractions!? which was a surprise to me because i didn't feel them! I feel a little tightening but no pain!? so they ended up giving me a shot to stop contractions, which was horrible! i have heard others talk about it before, but had never experienced it myself... i hope I never have to get that again! but it did its job and stopped the contractions. So now we head into a week full of appointments Monday, Labor and Delivery for a NST. Tuesday appt. with MFM Dr. Wednesday, 32 week cervical check and FFN test. and Thursday another NST! here we go! whatever it takes to keep these babies growing and healthy! pray for baby girl that she is just small!

31 weeks... dialating.

2010-07-04T20:32:00.000-07:00

Seriously! I cant believe how huge my stomach can/will/is stretching! it's pretty amazing! Well I had my 30 week check-up appt this week, and was surprised to learn that I am already dilated to a 1 and a half and 50% effaced! this concerned my OB so he sent me to the hospital for monitoring and to get the steroid shots for the babies lungs.. just to be safe. I haven't been feeling any contractions and the babies are looking great, so he put me on "modified" bed rest, I basically just need to take it a little more easy... Like no more bike rides, jumping on the trampoline, vacuuming, mopping.. ya know, all the fun stuff! I really want to do all I can to keep these babies baking in here! My OB was saying, "lets try to make it to at least 34 weeks" I'm thinking not 34! more like 36! we will see, I guess?

How far along: 31 weeks

Total Weight Gain: 29 lbs And more to come!

Symptoms: pressure! no contractions... but alot of pressure! and very sore back!

Stretch Marks: Still none!

Sleep: I wish! when I lay down I cant breath and have bad acid reflux, when I prop the pillows up my back really hurts! when I lay on either side my ribs feel like they are going to collapse! I know, I know...whaa whaa!

Best Moment Last Week: finding out that the babies aren't breech anymore! baby A is head down and baby b is transverse, but more head down than feet! hope they stay that way!

Movement: OH MY GOODNESS! these kids are already out of control!

Cravings: Apples. Apples and Apples. and a little steak still every now and then...

What I Miss: Diet Dr. Pepper ( I have done pretty good with no caffeine this pregnancy.)

What am I looking forward to: making it to the next 34 week milestone! 3 more weeks!

Milestones: 31 weeks!... every week counts now!

How is Daddy? Terrified. seriously.

Here is a picture from a baby shower that my mother and sister in-laws gave me! it was so much fun! I got so many cute things!

This is it. the big 31 week picture! ouch.. my achin' back!

Twins Nursery sneek-peek

2010-06-01T14:14:00.000-07:00

Well, I am finally feeling more "complete" about the nursery. I still have a few more cosmetic details that I would like to do in there like some wall hangings and little "extras" but i feel like it's coming all together! I took on the task of making all my own bedding.... which was alot more work that I really thought it would be! TIMES TWO! Thanks to my mother-in law for helping me out a little, I was able to finish it! and I think it turned out super cute! It was a little challenging to find fabric that wold work well for boy and girl. We scored theses awesome cribs and changing table (couldn't fit it in the whole room picture) from some Friends of ours for a steal! and I found the cute and comfy rocker and ottoman in the classifieds for only 150.00! and I made a little matching slipcover for the ottoman to tie it all in. My husband was a trooper, and hung these cute chandeliers (from Ikea!) and he even went the extra mile and put a dimmer switch on them so we can dim them to a nice low light for all those late night feedings! it really is a super comfy, relaxing room. We love to just go sit in there and relax.

Here is a picture of me at 26 weeks with the twins, I am beginning to feel like I am getting that layer all-over and in my face! I made this super easy dress and belt! This pregnancy has made me be quite the sewer!

24 weeks twins and belly pics

2010-05-19T21:29:00.000-07:00

How far along: 24 weeks

Total Weight Gain: 20 lbs bring it on!

Symptoms: shortness of breath! I cant seem to catch my breath! It kind of feels like there are two babies using my lungs as a pillow oh wait...... there is!

Stretch Marks: none....yet.

Sleep: Not good. I still cant seem to get a good nights rest, I am finding it hard to breath at night?

Best Moment Last Week: Got my grades for last semester... straight A's! whoo hoo! good way to finish out the year!

Movement: YES! and come to find out at my ultrasound today baby A flipped into breach position also! so now I have 4 little feet using my bladder as a trampoline!

Cravings: Still.....STEAK AND STRAWBERRIES! ! and now the newest addition, APPLES! I really eat at least 3 or 4 whole apples a day! I LOVE THEM!

What I Miss: breathing. (nah it's overrated)

What am I looking forward to:Taking a little weekend get-a-way to St. George this weekend!

Milestones: Turned 31 this week!!!!!!

How is Daddy? loves when I walk in a room to say " Are you pregnant?" ha. ha.

below is my regular 24 week belly shot picture... hello! I really am having a hard time seeing where I go from here.. my belly feels SO huge! (and yes... that is my belly button)

This is a picture of me 24 weeks(on the left) and my friend who is 2 weeks away from delivery!

Photobucket src="http://i929.photobucket.com/albums/ad136/cyndilowry_2010/signature.png">

21 weeks, quiz and pictures!

2010-04-25T21:49:00.000-07:00

We had our 20 week ultrasound this week! it was so awesome! Baby "A" (boy) measured right on and Baby "B" (girl) was just a few days behind, but the doc didn't seemed concerned about that at all. all there organs and bones and EVERYTHING looked great! I have been working on getting their room finished and we got a steal of a deal on the cutest cribs form a Friend of ours who's twins just moved to bigger beds! I will post some pictures when I am done.

Other than that I have just been busy with finishing up this semester of school, I cant wait till its over!

I decided to do this quiz that I have seen on others blogs...

How far along: 21 weeks

Total Weight Gain: 14 lbs (only 5 lbs. less than my TOTAL weight gain with my last pregnancy!!)

Symptoms: back pain!! my back kills, but when you consider the drastic change in my belly it makes sense. and just the past few days my ribs feel like they are being stretched apart?

Stretch Marks: none....yet.

Sleep: Not good. I toss and turn all night and I am usually lying awake in bed from about 4:00am to 6:00 am..... better get used to it, right?

Best Moment Last Week: the 20 week ultrasound! it was amazing to see how big the babies have grown! And it was very reassuring to see that everything looked good so far!

Movement: ALL THE TIME! I haven't totally been able to pinpoint which baby is giving all the kicks, but I feel alot of movement in my lower abdomen which is right where baby A (the boy) is.

Cravings: STEAK AND STRAWBERRIES! this has been my craving throughout the whole pregnancy! I cant get enough of either! I go through a whole 5 lb flat of strawberries in 2 days!

What I Miss: MEK Jeans (if anyone knows where to get maternity MEK jeans let me know!)

What am I looking forward to: Getting the nursery finished up! hopefully this week!

Milestones: LAST WEEK OF THIS SCHOOL SEMESTER!!! (then I am taking a break till after the babies come!)

How is Daddy? excited to see a big belly!

WEEKS 19, 20 and 21

That's, why my back hurts!

JUST KIDDING!

2010-04-07T20:43:00.000-07:00

NOT two boys! but, ONE BOY & ONE GIRL!!!!!!!

I cant even believe it! we are so excited for another handsome boy, and a long awaited little girl! WOW!

just kidding! NOT Two Boys!!!

2010-04-07T20:09:00.000-07:00

I cant even believe it! I went in today for a much appreciated unscheduled ultrasound, and found out that one of our supposed little boys was not so much boy anymore! It's a GIRL! so we are blessed enough to be expecting a sweet little boy and a precious baby girl! I guess I have a few items to return!

Other than that, things are going pretty textbook on the pregnancy symptoms... I have massive back pain, although that is not to surprising seeing how fast my stomach has grown! and I get heart burn often, you know the kind that feels like acid is eating your esophagus away :) fun. I really am quite surprised how fast my stomach just grew over the past few weeks. I have even had people come up and rub it! good thing I don't get weirded out by that. I am so excited to know the "true" genders now and start planning a nursery! I really want to have things ready fairly early this pregnancy, seeing how my other two pregnancy's I delivered at 36.5 and 35 weeks. time to shop!

here are some recent belly pics, it is amazing to see the difference in one week! the top picture is 17 weeks, and the bottom is 18 weeks! wow! here we go!

17 weeks

18 weeks

2 + 2 = 4

2010-03-17T22:03:00.000-07:00

Yes, those are blue storks and you know what blue storks carry right?.... BOYS! we are adding two more boys to the bunch! We are so excited! 4 boys! I hadn't quite imagined having 4 boys, but the more I think about it the more excited I get! I think it will be good because Auggie is really going to toughen those boys right up! Wish us luck!

I make BOYS!!!!

2010-03-15T09:32:00.000-07:00

Yep! That's right! apparently my body and my husbands sperm like to make BOYS! I had an ultrasound last week (14 weeks 5 days) and there they were.... THE BOYS! I could hardly believe it! of course Russ is SOOO excited, he finally has his big hunting crew he wanted! I really am excited too! All 4 boys are going to have so much fun together, and for what I know of them, boys seem really easy?! So now comes the hard part.... the names! I have to have names that are somewhere in our family history and a little original but not crazy, ya know?

Other than that, things have been pretty uneventful? I feel like my belly has doubled in the past week. I haven't uploaded the picture of 15 weeks yet, but I will add it when I do. I really don't know much else going on with the babies right now, I still don't feel them moving yet? I think that is normal for 15 weeks, right? I have my 16 week appointment this Friday, so I am excited to see how things are going.

We are headed out this Sunday on a much needed vacation to Disneyland! the boys are so excited! and we figured now would probably be the best time to go, before I get to huge and uncomfortable. whoo hoo!

here is my 14 week belly shot. I will have to upload my 15 week later, I swear it is WAY bigger! or at least thats what it feels like!

12 Weeks

2010-02-26T16:05:00.000-08:00

I cant believe I am almost out of the first trimester! Things so far have been pretty good? I have the usual early pregnancy symptoms, nausea (but no throwing up!) tired all day, but cant sleep all night! this one is probably the most annoying right now. I really am having a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep. I am usually a good sleeper. But it probably hasn't helped that my little 2 year old has been super sick and not sleeping well either.

I went to my 12 week appointment this week, its amazing how nervous I get, I kind of go there expecting to be missing one baby or BOTH babies, I guess that is just part of the gift of infertility that keeps on giving! constant worry and fear for the worse! But, luckily, everything looked great! both babies were measuring a few day ahead of schedule and their heart rates were perfect!

here are some pictures of the ultrasound AND I am already feeling like a bad mom, but I cant remember which baby they said was baby "A" and which was baby "B"! Is that horrible or what!? but baby "A" or baby"B" I love them both the same.

one baby

Two baby

12 week belly

Potty Time

2010-02-19T20:57:00.000-08:00

Here's the situation...

I DO NOT WANT 3 KIDS IN DIAPERS!

Here's the dilemma... I tried one day of "big boy" underware with Auggie and he only went in the potty ONCE and peed his pants all day long! What do I do!? I need some serious help in the potty training department! I feel like I don't remember this at all with milo? I was thinking of trying some instructional DVD's that would get him "pumped" to go pee-pee in the potty! but I have no idea where to begin?

So if any one is reading this... and you have any helpful ideas, please let me know! I'm desperate! I have about 5 months to get him OUT of diapers! HELP!

New Blog Name... new attitude.

2010-02-15T14:33:00.000-08:00

So, I have been thinking ALOT lately about this whole crazy infertility world. I have read so many blogs about others and their challenges with infertility, pregnancy, loss etc... And I would get a little overwhelmed thinking of all the grief that we go through or may go through!

So I heard this song.....Now, hear me out here, I'm not some big obsessive Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana fan. However. I was listening to the song of hers tittled "The Climb" (Dont mind the video, just listen to the words!) If you haven't ever listened to it, I suggest you do, especially if you are of ever have faced infertility or the challenges that come with it.

And this really made me think. Isn't that what we are all in the process of right now? Our own individual "climb" and I feel that the Infertility "climb" has to be one of the worst out there. I found myself feeling bad that I was at this point of the "climb" when so many others out there were still lagging behind a little. But then when I look back a the "climbs" that I have made, I find it amazing that no matter how hard it was, or what the outcome was, at some point, I turned around, and did it all over again! And I know of, and have read so many other fellow bloggers, who have done the exact same thing in even harder circumstances than myself. I am so inspired by so many of you out there!

So, that is my reason for the name change. I just felt that it is more fitting for this type of blog that deals with struggles of infertility AND pregancy!

8 weeks

2010-01-28T20:32:00.000-08:00

8 weeks 1 day ultrasound

I had my first official 8 week appointment this week! everything went really well! one baby is messuring at 8 weeks 3 days and one baby is messuring at 8 weeks 2 days. So both were ahead of schedule! I have felt a little sick at times, which is weird for me because with my last two preganancys I wasnt sick at all. Im hoping it doesnt get any worse! but maybe the old wives true that you get more sick with girls? two girls?.... one girl? whatever! we are excited no matter what! my next appt. is 4 weeks from now, so I just wait. easy.

TWO!!!!!

2010-01-15T13:22:00.001-08:00

I am speechless. There are no real words to express the excitement we have over this miracle! if you want the whole story go here But the short version...

Two Babies, Two Heartbeats, Two Happy Parents, Two Excited Brothers.

6 weeks 4 days

2010-01-15T13:16:00.000-08:00

TWO HEARTBEATS!!!

I cant even belive it! two babies! Baby A is messuring at 6 weeks 4 days and Baby B is just a little behind at 6 weeks 2 days! and we were able to see their perfect little fluttering hearts! AMAZING! more good to come!

5 weeks 4 days

2010-01-08T14:41:00.000-08:00

Sooo..... I got really sick this week, like REALLY sick! I got the stomach flu, followed by a nasty sinus infection, and a bladder infection all within like 3 days! it has been a ruff week!

well..... my mom happens to work at my OB's office and thanks to my fabulous Dr. I was able to go in today and take a "peek" at what is going on in there....

and....

well....

TWO!

Now I know it is still really early and who knows what could happen from here? But for now we have TWO little growing babies! we are so excited and haven't even begun to think of all the work that comes along with this! But for now, we are happy.

(looks like you were right Stephanie!)

5 weeks 1 day

2010-01-05T13:44:00.000-08:00

I feel like I am lying when I tell people that I am pregnant! it still is not real to me and it is driving Russ CRAZY that I cant just admit it and be happy. dont get me wrong, I am Happy! It just seems to good to be true! ya' know? well I went in this morning and had my second blood test to make sure my HCG levels were rising appropriately. the levels are suppose to double every 48 to 72 hours. So my first level of 271 should have been at LEAST 2100 right? well, I got the call from the nurse who told me that my levels were "ok" so automatically I got a little nervous. "ok" what does "ok" mean? so I asked what was the number and she said 6853..... um? I think that's a little more than "ok" that means that it is doubling every 30 hours! So to make a long story short... I'm pregnant. 5 weeks 1 day to be exact. now if I could only convince myself of that. I go in next Wednesday to get an ultrasound to see how many of these little guys stayed around!? maybe then it will feel more real?

12dp2dt

2009-12-29T15:27:00.000-08:00

total shock.
Beta 271

POSITIVE!

I cant even believe it! I had absolutely no symptoms or indications that i could even be pregnant! I was SURE that this was a bust! I was calculating how many more semesters of student loans I would have to get before I could try next time! I had researched all over the Internet to try and find someone who had no symptoms and still came out with a positive beta... let me tell ya, there were slim pickins' so this post will be for those who googled "no symptoms BFP" or "no symptoms positive beta" because that's me! OK. now I'm just rambling, I am so excited and shocked! really.

Beta Eve

2009-12-28T20:48:00.000-08:00

twas the night before beta

and all through my body,

not a creature was stirring,

not even the three potential babies in my belly.

OK, you get where I'm going with this....

Tomorrow is the big day! I have not taken a home test yet, out of pure fear that once I see a negative it is over! so I am going to leave my fate to the nurse who dares call me tomorrow to give me my results. I really don't "feel" anything! i have a backache, but I am sure that is due to all the packing I have been doing for our move this Saturday. so now I will just try to be calm, think positive thoughts, remain hopeful and try not to freak out too much!

here we go!

if you pray... now is the time to do it!

5dp2dt

2009-12-22T22:27:00.000-08:00

So I'm a little down today, in more ways than one. I have been felling pretty large in the belly with hyperstimulation which on one hand was a bummer because it was very uncomfortable but I was told by the nurses, that that could be a good sign because hyperstimulation symptoms worsen with pregnancy, and my last successful in-vitro I had it and, well, it worked! so although the hyperstimulaton wasn't something I would wish on anyone, it gave me a little hope that this was going to work this time. Well, ANYWAY, I woke up this morning and my stomach size and dramatically decreased!? like really! by like 4 inches! so now although I am not one to complain about a shrinking waistline... I am complaining!!! I feel like all hope is lost right now because wouldn't it get worse if my body was putting out pregnancy hormones right now? maybe I am just over analyzing the whole thing. Russ told me today as I was venting to him about this "it's ok. you still look pregnant to me." thanks?

orange sized ovaries

2009-12-21T20:52:00.000-08:00

So I went in to get an ultrasound today just to make sure that my bloated belly was not to dangerous, and everything checked out OK, there was definitely fluid in there, but not a harmful amount. However! the Dr. informed me that my ovaries are the size of ORANGES! so that explains why I look like I am 6 months pregnant! and why I feel like my back is breaking! he also said that the blister on my belly button (which is now totally bruised all around it) is due to the pressure of my insides pushing outward. whenever I leave the house and go out in public I fear that someone is going to ask me how far along I am! I probably feel alot bigger than I actually look...maybe?

no other significant changes. I am 4dp2dt and I have felt a few cramping twinges tonight, maybe implantation? i can hope!

3dp2dt

2009-12-20T22:18:00.000-08:00

This is weird....
I have this weird blood blister thing on the INSIDE of my belly button? i have tried to google it, and see if anyone else has experienced something like this and found nothing!? so if any fellow IVF-ers out there have heard of anything like this please do tell! I think i will call Dr. Marrs tomorrow and see if he knows anything about this!

Other than that... I am still really full in the belly and VERY sore in the ovaries and back! i feel a little nauseous at times but i think that is due to my belly being full of fluid and large ovaries?

I am still very emotional, but a little optimistic? just a little. I asked Auggie today if he wanted mommy to have more babies and he said "ya" and then i asked how many? and he said "two" (two being the only number he knows right now.... but we can just think that he really knows the future of our family right?) and then i said are they girls or boys? and he said "kitties!" (and proceeded to meow like a cat) so maybe he doesn't know as much as i think he did? good times.

I am very thankful for all the distractions going on this week. Tomorrow is Russ' birthday! and then we have all the exciting Christmas events the rest of the week! and then the Big blood test on the 29th!

easy.
right?

1dp2dt

2009-12-18T13:56:00.000-08:00

(one day past two day transfer)

Can you say emotional wreck? we have decided not to freeze the remaining embryos. we weighed out our options and due to the last two failed frozen cycles we felt that if this doesn't work this time, we would probably want to do another fresh cycle and not waste our money on another frozen which our Dr said would be a much lower success rate than a fresh cycle. this was a very hard decision for us. but i feel like it is our way of saying "OK, Lord, we are putting our complete faith in this and trust that if this is whats meant to be for us right now, then so be it!" this is not the easiest decision to make while you are pumping your body full of extra hormones.

I am trying really hard to stay in my bed for the full 36 hours that they suggested for the bed rest. (besides going to see Milo's Christmas program at school...who could resist!?) this is an extremely difficult thing for me to do! i can see things lying on the floor, and can just imagine how exciting it would be to pick them up and vacuum some nice clean lines into the carpet! HEAVEN!!! but, no. because with everyone of those thoughts comes the thought of "would that be worth jeopardizing the growth of our three potential children?!" NO. it would not. so I lie here, switching from side to side because if i lay on my back then the weight of all the fluid in my abdomen causes me to feel super nauseous and ill. and i go through moments of fear, what if this doesn't work this time? and i am lying here sobbing thinking of how i will take the news if it is negative, and on the other hand i get really excited thinking about the possibility of adding more children to our future! and i cry over that as well! so basically i cry all day long! and poor Russ. bless his heart. he really is doing well at juggling his job, school, the kids and the worlds most emotional wife all at the same time! I am so blessed to have such a supportive group of Friends and family to help me through this. THANK YOU!

whats new?

2009-12-17T17:17:00.001-08:00

All of our time, energy and money has pretty much been focused on this

(oh ya, and finals too!)

3's a crowd

2009-12-17T14:19:00.000-08:00

so the embryo transfer is complete, the Valium has slowly wore off and i am lying here in bed with my stomach full of fluid (due to hyper stimulation) and full of embryos (3 to be exact!) now i just wait.... and wait...and wait.... I have vowed to myself to no get out of bed at all this time (except to use the bathroom) so i am going to have Russ get me some movies and have a mini movie marathon here in my bed. everything went better than i even imagined at the transfer today! i am feeling very hopeful that at least ONE of those little embryos can stick!

please

please

please

say this works this time.

Big Day!

2009-12-14T23:01:00.000-08:00

So tomorrow is the big Egg Retrieval day! I am so anxious I cant even stand it! we know now that I have a TON of follicles (around 60!) but the big question is, how many of those have good eggs in them? we will find out tomorrow! then hopefully the 2 best ones will go back in on Thursday!

I heart needles in my stomach

2009-12-04T14:25:00.000-08:00

So, I got an ultrasound and hormone blood work on Wednesday, and they said they everything looked good, so we are OK to start all the stimulation medication now! they said I have a TON of follicles so far (like over 30!) so hopefully all these shots I am doing now will help all those follicles grow into big strong eggs! I had forgotten how bad the bravelle stings as it is going in! OUCH! o-well, it will all be worth it in the end.... i hope. I go back in on Monday to get another ultrasound and Blood work till then I will just continue to stab my self in the stomach every night! hooray for me!

Starting Over

2009-11-24T14:59:00.000-08:00

here I am again... back on the in-vitro roller coaster! which is both exciting and terrifying. we are starting from square one again since we had no more frozen embryos left :( However we are using a different Dr. this time (Dr. Marrs and Dr. Richards) they have great success rates, so we are very hopefull this time! I am currently on the lurpon injections right now and am hoping to start the bravelle injections the first week of December! which would mean the Egg retrieval would be sometime around December 12th or 13th! that seems so far away! hopefully it goes by fast with all the holidays coming up! wish me luck!

MiLo'S 7th BiRtHDaY!

2009-07-31T22:14:00.001-07:00

Look at this sweet little baby! I cant believe he is 7 now! time has gone by so fast! we used to call this his "Tommy boy" face. He would smile really big and pull his chin back, and get all... chubby! and he had some CRAZY hair! he still is just as sweet as he was when he was a baby.

we started the day off right with Milo's favorite Birthday breakfast! which consisted of hash browns sausage and bacon and dutch babies (aka Swedish pancakes in mini muffin tins) mmmmm mmmmm!

This year all Milo wanted for his birthday was his room to be redone, so we gave him a little older room by painting it and adding a few new things and cool posters to it. He was really specific on the colors we could use and he really wanted under his loft bed to be an art studio! he was thinking that when kids came over they could purchase his art work, and that way he can earn money! what a great idea! LOVE IT!

The next day he had a luau/pool party with some Friends and family. It was tons of fun and as usual way to much food! but it was a great wrap up of Milo's Big Birthday Weekend! WE LOVE YOU MILO! HaPpy BiRThDaY!!!

I just had to throw in this picture of Auggie relaxing in Milo's new chair! he is so jealous of his big
brothers new room!

Summertime...

2009-07-02T21:08:00.001-07:00

Bike Rides! we LOVE going on bike rides right now! Auggie likes to grab the back of my hair and pull on it, OUCH! Milo is such a good little rider, he loves to try and do jumps off the curb.

First Zucchini of the season! We have a garden at Nana and Papas house. It is amazing to see everything grow so fast!

Auggie's shoe fascination... Aug is obsessed with putting every ones shoes on, but I think these ones are my favorite! heels really do help the legs look more slender!

This is what you get when you you leave two bored boys with a roll of tape!

... And of course Aug had to see what all the fun was about!

Shirt off, outside, getting messy.... pretty much sums up our summer so far!

2nd Annual Shabby Chic Boutique

2009-06-17T22:32:00.001-07:00

we are doing a Boutique this next week at the PG Villas Clubhouse

You must come to see all the cute thing we will have...

Baby Bling Bows, Super cute Little girl dresses made by the talented Nicole Miller, Glitter Toes, Vintage Earings, So Watch Yourself Watches, Freeze Dry Food Storage, Tasty Treats, Designer Hats, Jewlery and much more!!!

You have to come to see all this Amazing Stuff! Hope to see you there!

Video for Cyndi made by Rusty

2009-06-13T23:46:00.001-07:00

Family Pictures!!

2009-05-28T21:11:00.001-07:00

We finally got our much needed family pictures taken, by the oh so talented Tif!

She did such a fabulous job! there are so many cute ones to chose from, that I just posted A ton! thanks Tif!

Fresh Start

2009-01-07T22:59:00.000-08:00

Today we went and met with a new Dr. We just felt like we needed a fresh start, a second opinion, a new plan. the consultation went amazingly well. The Dr. was VERY personable, and took alot of time explaining every little detail with us (2 whole hours!) He and his partner are very knowledgeable in the field of infertility and have amazing success rates in achieving pregnancy through IVF. And to top it all off, it is WAY less expensive than at our previous clinic! However, it is still going to cost us around 9,000 dollars, so we are going to have to seek out ways to earn some extra cash... But if all goes well, which I am sure it will if this is what is suppose to happen, then we can hopefully proceed with Another IVF sometime this April or May! This gets me excited to think about, I know that may sound hard to believe, excitement for Shots, ultrasounds, blood draws, the horrid egg retrieval, and the dreaded 2 week wait? But I just feel this is suppose to happen. I don't know why, or how? but I have a good feeling about this.

no news is good news... right?

2008-12-28T19:21:00.000-08:00

WRONG!

My delay of entry wasn't because I was to busy celebrating, that I didn't have a chance to update the blog. In fact, it was quite opposite. I received the call from the Dr.'s Office yesterday stating that my test was negative, last time, they informed me that my levels were "less than 1" But not this time, no, no, no, I didn't get the pleasure of even having a number this time, that's right, a big fat ZERO! so basically not a chance on earth that i could possibly be pregnant.

as for plans for the future... who knows? those were are last frozen embryos, and to start fresh again, I am going to need to come up with about 15.000.00$. so if any one has any brilliant ideas, on how to raise money (preferably legally, but if not O-well) or to magically get pregnant, I am up for them! bring it on.

sincerely,

depressed and confused.

Milo's Wish

2008-12-26T21:01:00.000-08:00

We Went to the mall today, and Milo found a penny on the ground. He wanted to go throw it in the fountain to make a wish, when we got to the fountain he found the perfect spot to throw it, he pondered for a minute and then I heard him whisper " I wish for the embryos to work" and threw his penny in. My heart just melted, of all the things a 6 year old could wish for...

I wish for that too.

tomorrow is the big day! my mind is telling me, whatever the outcome, it is what was meant to be. But, my heart is saying PLEASE let this be it!

Russ' Birthday Celebration Week!

2008-12-23T08:37:00.001-08:00

Rusty turned the big 32 this week! he has one of those dreaded December Birthdays where he always gets the good ol' "this is for your birthday AND Christmas" gift. So we had a full week of celebrating for him so he would feel special.

We started out with a party at our house with my side of the Family, where Russ served up some of his famous favorite desert, Chocolate Waffles! mmmmm!

I can never get him to be serious...

Next we had a little Friend get together at Russ' restaurant of choice, which of course was Chili's (he cant pass up on a good burger)

"the gang"

James and Anne

What would a party be without Matt and Alissa?

John And Dia...

Darrin and Darcie and there newest addition (#5!)

Last but not least... Andy (minus his better half, We missed you Whit!)

once again.... not a serious face.

And to top it all off, we wrapped up the week with a party at the Lowry House which is always filled with good food and Fun!

Finally a "normal" face!

Happy Birthday Rusty! We Love You!

I just had to put this picture in because of Auggies poor face! he is walking/falling so much he looks like he's been beat up! poor guy!

6dp5dt

2008-12-22T08:31:00.000-08:00

I don't know who even reads this blog? But if you do, i apologize for all the "ho-hummness" I am kind of a waste of a human being right now, my whole self is being consumed with thoughts of those little embryos. I really need to focus on something else, or my family just might send me to the loony bin.

However, I am pretty proud of myself for not doing a home test yet. I have two sitting in the drawer, but i am so afraid that it will be negative, that I would like to hold on to this "hope" just a little longer before having a huge meltdown. Besides, it's almost Christmas, so i don't think it would be wise to be Debbie downer all Christmas long, it just wouldn't be fair to my family. But really... I am not too hopeful, I really have no symptoms whatsoever! nothing. I wish I just had a little something to show that things were moving down there! ANYTHING! So here I am, Wishing, Waiting, Hoping, Praying, for a true Christmas miracle. 5 more days to go...

I'm losing my MIND!

2008-12-19T12:36:00.000-08:00

3 days down, 8 more days till test!

I have officially over-researched this whole thing! I have googled my brains out! and have come up more lost than when I started! it's just amazing to me how many other people are going through this same thing. it's actually kind of depressing. besides m fragile mental state, all is "well" and by "well" I mean, I am feeling nothing! not one little sign that could give me any sort of direction on how I should be feeling. I have put op pictures of the Little embryos all around the house with little thoughts of encouragement written on them, Milo is so cute, he always prays for them in his prayers, he blesses them to "hatch" and "grow big". poor little guy, has had to hear more female medical lingo than most 6 year olds. Russ is being really supportive, he hangs on to the emotional roller coaster that I take the family on everyday. I sometimes think, hmmm, I wonder if he stares at the pictures of our embryos all day, saying to himself "please work, please work, please work" and if he does, is it only because he hates he meltdown that occurs after the big negative? or does he truly want this as much as I do? But I know he really wants more children, I just don't thin k he thought it would be such a struggle and hormonal battle to do so! well guess what... me neither! But We do what we got to do.

Say hello to my little friends...

2008-12-16T20:16:00.000-08:00

So here they are, my new house guests. I hope to make them feel comfortable, so they will want to nuzzle up for a few months and make a home. The transfer went well today. I was a little anxious when I woke up to the snow this morning, and it doesn't help to have the thought weighing in the back of my mind that this is it! these are the last two frozen embryos we have! But over all I was feeling pretty positive. the only bump in the whole procedure was my bladder! I was told to go in with a full bladder. well once we got there things were a little behind, so by the time that we actually went into the procedure room, I was ready to BURST! so it made it very uncomfortable! I was suppose to lay there for at least 15 minutes after the transfer, but after about 5 minutes, i couldn't take it anymore, I bolted for the bathroom! So despite that little incident, every thing went good. Now all there is to do is keep up on all the shots and pills, and WAIT! simple, right? I will keep an update of the wretched wait. at least I have the holidays to help with my every second obsessing....NOT!

Ready to go...

2008-12-11T11:36:00.000-08:00

I went in to the office today for my final check before the Embryo transfer. Everything was great! they checked my lining to see the thickness, and they want it to be anything greater than 6. and mine was at 12! so we are right on track to do the transfer this Tuesday! I start the dreaded progesterone shots tonight, and go in on Tuesday morning for transfer! It has come so quick! I am trying to keep really positive, and know that everything will work out, just as it is suppose to. Right? I might need a lot of reminding in the next few weeks...

Where do I begin?.....

2008-12-10T20:53:00.000-08:00

I have been a major blog slacker! (sorry summer) Life has just been going by so fast, i feel like I haven't had a second to catch-up, so here it is... this is a jumbled mess of what we have been up to for the last few weeks.

First, The annual Gingerbread House

Every year Russ' mom does this amazing gingerbread house, and let's all the kids decorate it. usually all the kids have been to young so it ends up being an adult activity. But this year the kids were a perfect age to help out, and ended up doing most of it themselves! it turned out a huge success as always!

Uncle Jeffy carefully placing the chocolate chimney bricks...

Me, in charge of the frosting bag! whoo hoo!

Rusty and Paul doing the daddy day care for the little guys.

All the proud kids and the finished product.

Next, Milo has been loosing teeth!

this is a picture of him right after he lost one of his big front teeth...

And this is a picture of him after he lost his OTHER front tooth! I cant help but chuckle when i look at his silly little smile! now he can really sing "All I want for Christmas, is my two front teeth!"

Temple Square.

We Decided to go see the lights at Temple Square while the weather was still a little bit warm, Although Jeffy must have thought it was a little warmer than it really was, he was wearing SHORTS and FLIP FLOPS! everyone was looking at him like he was crazy!

And last but not least...

Auggie is Walking! He is walking everywhere, and into everything! he falls down a bit, but it doesn't phase him, he just gets back up and keeps going! he really is getting to be alot of fun, but he really knows how to razz up Milo. Poor Milo, went from being a calm and quiet only child to a big bully for a little brother!

Trouble!

I took Aug on the carousel at the mall, they only let us ride on the handicap seat because they said he was to small for the horses? He still had fun.

Next step...

2008-11-26T09:32:00.000-08:00

So we met with the Dr. on Monday, it went VERY well. (well as good as it can go, with someone telling you since your last feble attempt to have children failed, so you only have one more chance at doing a "Cheaper"frozen cycle.) Anywho... We are able to give it another try in just 3 weeks! I was afraid that I might have to wait, but with this news, i get a little excited at the thought of being able to try again..Now! Although it was a little frustrating that there were no answers for the last failed transfer, I am hopeful this time. I have a brighter understanding that things will "work-out" I don't know how, but it will.

here's the plan:

- continue taking prenatal vitamin, and baby aspirin.
- get my BMI to at least 19 (7 lbs of fat shouldn't be to hard with thanksgiving tomorrow!)
- No Lupron this time! (since I don't ovulate on my own, there is no point in suppressing my ovaries, so shots in the belly! but still in the butt :( )
- Pray hard that this is what is suppose to happen right now.

Moving on...

2008-11-20T07:01:00.000-08:00

The final verdict came back... Negative. They like to see your level be at 100 or more to consider it a positive test. Well mine was "less than 1" What the! I mean not even a little chance! it was kind of a hard day yesterday. I mean I knew it would be negative from all the home tests I took, But I guess in the back of my head I was kind of hoping for a miracle. And to go from consuming my every waking thought to taking the pills, suppositories, shots, Over and over again, timing it just right every day, to one phone call and STOP! just quit all the stuff you have been doing to your body to hold on to the little guys, and do nothing? So I am getting better. I will move on. I will try again. and it could happen again. We will meet with the Dr. on Monday, and discuss our next plan of attack for our final two embryos... here we go again.

tommorow's the big day....

2008-11-18T14:14:00.000-08:00

So I go in tomorrow morning for the official blood test. But, I am pretty sure, that 15 home pregnancy tests are pretty accurate. I am really just glad, i am going in knowing that it is going to come back negative, so it wont be a big shocker when they call with the results tomorrow afternoon.

So if ever I needed a miracle.... now is it! BUT, the good news is, I have 2 more frozen little embies left, so we have 1 more chance! (if my body can handle it!)

Wish me luck

Stranger things have happened right?

8dp5dt

2008-11-13T14:21:00.000-08:00

NEGATIVE.

and not just my attitude.

only slight "feeling" i felt today, was a little twinge in my belly, kind of like someone kicked me in the stomach, but I only felt it for a split second. Then it was gone. I'm sure it was just your average "feeling" that everyone gets, but because I am on super sensitive, over-analyzer mode, I am taking note of it.

7dp5dt

2008-11-12T15:09:00.000-08:00

lets just get this over with......

Another BFN!! ya, that's right BIG FREAKIN NEGATIVE!

Now I'm getting a little nervous. I called my sister, she tried to reassure me, it helped a little. It still hasn't even been a whole week... it could change...we will see....tomorrow.

Still NO symptoms! I cant even make any up at this point.

A Little Crazy....

2008-11-11T14:27:00.000-08:00

So I have done WAY to much searching on the Internet. I have talked my self (and my sister!) into testing EARLY!!! this is a major NO, NO! what if it is negative, and I get all down and depressed for the next week (depressed? who me? never.) what if it says positive but it is a false positive? what to do, what to do? Last time I held strong. I waited out the whole two weeks and only did the blood test! I must have been crazy! But I don't know what it is about this time? I just am feeling really negative, and so I feel like I need to test so I can pre-warn the person who has to call me with the negative result. Waugh Waugh (Debbie downer here.)

So after much debate, I talked my self into going to the Dollar store to get a pregnancy test! and one test turned out to be 9 tests, just so I can test everyday till my blood test! The poor kid working the cash register couldn't even make eye contact with me, crazy lady coming through buying the store out of pregnancy tests!

so I RUSHED home, squeezed out enough pee to get 4 drops, dropped them on the little test, and watched, and watched........

till......

NEGATIVE!

OK, I'm fine. really. fine. So maybe its a little early, right? even though other people are getting positives on there HPT's before me. I'm good. I will just test again tomorrow. no big deal.

Who am I kidding? I'm a little annoyed.

4dp5dt

2008-11-09T14:24:00.000-08:00

OK so I woke up this morning with heartburn!? could it be a sign of pregnancy or just a memory of the nachos I had at 10:00 last night? we will see......

Days 1,2,3dp5dt

2008-11-08T10:54:00.000-08:00

If you can understand the title to my post, then you have probaly experinced some sort of infertility stuggle in life (sorry.) But if you cant, it stands for "Days Past 5 Day Transfer" and the signifigance of that is I need to wait till 14dp5dt to get the official blood test! whew this is going to be a long 2 weeks!

DAYS 1,2,3,

NOTHING! I feel nothing! besides on day 1 feeling the dizzy effects of the Valium, I now feel ZIP. Good? bad? I have no clue?

Transfer day!

2008-11-05T14:09:00.000-08:00

this transfer day was a little bit different from the last time, since last time I was suffering from OHSS (ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome) so I was more relaxed this time and kind of nervous too, because we had no Idea till we got there if the Embryos were going to "thaw" and survive!

I had made this little shirt that said "Welcome Home" I thought if I wore it, it would be good "mojo" or something... I'll try anything!

Well after arriving we were told the thawing went perfectly and two of our 4 blastocyst embroys were ready to be transferred! then the feeling kind of hit like "oh, shoot, do we really want to do this!?"....Well of course we do! they took us into the procedure room and there is a very calm and peacful feeling there, they dim the lights and its really quiet. Then one of the technichians came into the rom and showed us the picture of our little embryos (which looked very different from last time, different as in, not as good. But we think they are beautiful and love them no matter what.) they proceeded with the transfer, and then we layed there for about 30 min (ok, iI really dont know how long it was because I was so sleepy from the valium!)

now, we WAIT.

Halloween 2008

2008-11-01T21:12:00.000-07:00

WHAT TIME IS IT?!...

Is that Troy Bolton?

So Milo decided that this year he wanted to be (after seeing HSM3) Troy Bolton For Halloween. which was fine with me, because it was a super easy costume to put together!

Our only problem is getting the Paint color put of his hair now!...any suggestions?

Auggie was a cute little froggy this year so actually he was a "FR-AUGGIE" :)

"We're all in this together..." (sing along if you would like...)

The perfect couple... Darth and Pochahontas.

Auggie was loving Russ in this mask!

can you even belive how WARM it was this year!? I was able to wear flip flops, and short sleeves all night!

Getting ready to go Trick-or-treating!

Happy Froggy!

This was also this year at our Neighborhood halloween party, Does'nt Auggie make the cutest little girl?!

Here we go Again.....

2008-11-01T10:16:00.000-07:00

IVF #2

I cant believe we are here....AGAIN....SO SOON! only 9 months after the delivery of our last (successful) IVF, we have decided to just "go for it" we don't like the idea of another 6 year gap between children, so while we are "in" the baby mode, we are just going to try. I mean how hard could it be? right? WRONG!

Here's our process:

Birth control pills to start things rolling or should I say "flowing" :)

followed with, prenatal vitamins, baby aspirin, and estrodial twice a day.

lurpon shots in the belly every day till my lining becomes thick and comfy.

vaginal suppositories twice a day up the cha cha (isn't that a pleasant image?)

Then the dreaded Progesterone in Oil (better known as PIO) or as I like to call it PIA (pain in the A**.... Literally!) Hubby "gets" to give me this tender loving shot in the hip every night for a possibility of 11 weeks! ( oh, I can only hope!)

Transferring 2 of our 4 frozen Blastocyst embryos back into my cushy warm uterus, or as I hope they call it "home"

THEN comes the WORST, The 2 week wait! I hate this part! I wish they could put me in some medically induced coma, and wake me after the pregnancy test (only if it is positive, of course)

going in to get the blood test.... I'm nauseous just thinking about it.

Now just to clarify, I am documenting this for my own entertainment, but I have found so much comfort in searching and reading others story's, that I decided not to make this a private blog, so if I say something offensive or disturbing to you.... That's your problem! I'm a hormonal MESS right now! I am not liable for any actions, during this process.